Hi Elise! I came over to your Substack after you left a comment over on one of my posts. I was delighted to find this post. I relate to so much in it - this phrase - 'the romance of our children's childhoods' - wow that's something I could unpack for quite a while. And even when things look very beautiful, as you say, there are always difficulties. I can relate so much to the struggles of gardening and animal husbandry - It is worth it, but it is much less romantic than I imagined! I love how you point out how much beauty there is in all the chaos and maybe especially in the things that aren't quite as dreamy and romantic as we hoped.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment. It means so much! Doesn’t the phrase get you? It’s one of those commonplace quotes I remembered even without going back into my journal. And that’s exactly it! The instagram pictures of farming/gardening lied to me about a few things haha
I had so many thoughts reading this! First of all, having lived in Paris, London, and Scotland, I am reminded again how easy it is to romanticise other places. In my younger years especially, I fantasied about living in the US. I would still love to live in NYC one day but I don’t think it will ever happen! Having moved around quite a bit (I’ve also lived in Ireland and the Netherlands), I can say that nowhere stays magical for long, but it seems to be so human to feel that way about other places. I definitely still do it - longing to move back to Edinburgh or London, even though I know it would not be the experience I’m imagining.
I also think alllll the time about the “romance of our children’s childhoods”. When is our desire to expose our kids to particular things rooted in a genuine desire to root them in goodness and truth, and when is it essentially a vanity project? I try to ask myself this often when I’m encouraging or discouraging particular interests or affinities in my kids - is it motivated by a true desire for their good, or is it perhaps more of an ideological axe to grind? Of course we all have to raise our kids with the values we hold dear, to offer them the things that we think are good for them and that we hope will mould their characters - that’s unavoidable. But, I do think sometimes the choices we make for our kids are more about us than about them.
Wow! What an incredible travel experience you’ve had. You’re right, it is so easy to romanticize the places we aren’t at, or our past experiences of places we lived. It’s always so interesting hearing about people who love places that you are used to-I lived about an hour away from NYC for most of my life and (because it was so familiar) never fantasized about it the way other people in the US and abroad do. As you said, nowhere stays magic forever, because even in new places we are still the same fallen creatures muddling our way through life. It’s something I love about Gopnik’s essays, he maintains his love for Paris and the romance of it, but also shows that no place is perfect/matches up to our ideal vision. I love the questions you raise about our children’s childhood. It is such a fine line to balance and an important question to discern-why are we giving or withholding certain experiences, ideas, or things to/from our children. Are we thinking about their good, or are we using our children to as a sort of self-fulfillment project? Thanks so much for your reading and commenting, it made my day!
Hi Elise! I came over to your Substack after you left a comment over on one of my posts. I was delighted to find this post. I relate to so much in it - this phrase - 'the romance of our children's childhoods' - wow that's something I could unpack for quite a while. And even when things look very beautiful, as you say, there are always difficulties. I can relate so much to the struggles of gardening and animal husbandry - It is worth it, but it is much less romantic than I imagined! I love how you point out how much beauty there is in all the chaos and maybe especially in the things that aren't quite as dreamy and romantic as we hoped.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment. It means so much! Doesn’t the phrase get you? It’s one of those commonplace quotes I remembered even without going back into my journal. And that’s exactly it! The instagram pictures of farming/gardening lied to me about a few things haha
I had so many thoughts reading this! First of all, having lived in Paris, London, and Scotland, I am reminded again how easy it is to romanticise other places. In my younger years especially, I fantasied about living in the US. I would still love to live in NYC one day but I don’t think it will ever happen! Having moved around quite a bit (I’ve also lived in Ireland and the Netherlands), I can say that nowhere stays magical for long, but it seems to be so human to feel that way about other places. I definitely still do it - longing to move back to Edinburgh or London, even though I know it would not be the experience I’m imagining.
I also think alllll the time about the “romance of our children’s childhoods”. When is our desire to expose our kids to particular things rooted in a genuine desire to root them in goodness and truth, and when is it essentially a vanity project? I try to ask myself this often when I’m encouraging or discouraging particular interests or affinities in my kids - is it motivated by a true desire for their good, or is it perhaps more of an ideological axe to grind? Of course we all have to raise our kids with the values we hold dear, to offer them the things that we think are good for them and that we hope will mould their characters - that’s unavoidable. But, I do think sometimes the choices we make for our kids are more about us than about them.
Wow! What an incredible travel experience you’ve had. You’re right, it is so easy to romanticize the places we aren’t at, or our past experiences of places we lived. It’s always so interesting hearing about people who love places that you are used to-I lived about an hour away from NYC for most of my life and (because it was so familiar) never fantasized about it the way other people in the US and abroad do. As you said, nowhere stays magic forever, because even in new places we are still the same fallen creatures muddling our way through life. It’s something I love about Gopnik’s essays, he maintains his love for Paris and the romance of it, but also shows that no place is perfect/matches up to our ideal vision. I love the questions you raise about our children’s childhood. It is such a fine line to balance and an important question to discern-why are we giving or withholding certain experiences, ideas, or things to/from our children. Are we thinking about their good, or are we using our children to as a sort of self-fulfillment project? Thanks so much for your reading and commenting, it made my day!